Wait… This Blog ISN’T A List Of Metaphors For “Crammed?”

I’ve created a lot of blogs. Most of them have failed for various reasons. One was a random Tumblr blog called Born Out Of Weblog, which besides having a hilariously punny title, didn’t have much going for it other than sharing funny pictures with my friend Drew and hoping that he would “reblog” them. Sometimes he would. Other times he wouldn’t. It was all very exciting.

Another was a recipe sharing site called Recipe Go ‘Round that used Blogger, which for a while was pretty active but is now dead, although I still refer to it occasionally to find recipes posted by me or my friends. I enlisted friends of mine who are into cooking to post recipes, and we had a pretty good run for a while there. A Beatles-style falling-out ensued, lawsuits were filed, and the whole thing got really, really ugly.

There have been others, too, that I won’t get into in detail. One was a blog for my music. One involved awkward freeze-frames of Joe Buck, America’s Worst Sportscaster®. Another was essays about South Park, which I never shared it with anyone and only had three entries.

Anyway, All Things ‘Zilla uses WordPress, which has been my favorite blogging platform – in no small part because of the built-in stat-tracking feature. With other blogs I’ve had to install an external client like Google Analytics, which works fine, but doesn’t have the ease of WordPress’ built-in tracking.

OK, so it sounds like I’m advertising* for WordPress. Maybe I am. Maybe I’m not. It’s all part of the mystery.

*[That reminds me of a joke I just made up. I make up jokes, btw. Drew and I, along with our friend Kale, have a massive gmail thread going with a staggering amount of puns that we are collecting. Sometimes it takes a really long time to load. We may start a blog of these puns.

Anyway, the joke is: what former MLB pitcher now does terse advertising for companies?

Curt Shilling.]

This is all a roundabout way of introducing a list I’ve been collecting from the WordPress stats page, of search terms used that eventually land people on the blog. Some of them make perfect sense, like “all things zilla.” Some of them make less sense but I can still see it, like “grandmotherzilla.” And then some are total noodle-scratchers, like “metaphor for crammed” and “ΨΩΜΙ” and “lee min ho picture rare.” My personal favorite is probably “bridezilla aaaaaaaaaaaaaa.”

I love the Internet. I really do. Here are some favorites:

metaphor for crammed
jazz post stamps
flower boy
bridezilla aaaaaaaaaaaaaa
clubbing baby seals
grandmotherzilla
momzilla
groomzilla
jessica simpson
“banana bread” wedding
original pop tarts
clothes-optional
jennifer orbom
pants off
two men raising a little girl
19070s wedding cakes
ΨΩΜΙ
potato salad that keeps for a wedding
things to stamp on
fire hamburger
lee min ho picture rare
where to find things from the 1970s
cool puppies
little boy and girl going to party

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3 responses to “Wait… This Blog ISN’T A List Of Metaphors For “Crammed?”

  1. Josh and I have thought about starting several blogs, but they were no where near the coolness of South Park essays. We considered a blog about all things mediocre (that was going to be pretty funny since nothing would get horrible or stellar reviews, they would all get “meh” out of “meh”) and the other was a top ten list of whatever the heck we felt like.

    Hmm… nothing stopping us now.

    p.s. grandmotherzilla? wow.

  2. wow, wonder who’s searching for jorbom! my fav is ‘things to stamp on’

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